Jesus & Autism: Stories of Hope with Mandy Horne

Caregiving rarely color‑codes itself on our calendars. One day you’re navigating an adoption that looks nothing like the tidy plans you imagined; the next day, you’re juggling a teen’s complex needs alongside aging parents in the hospital. Mandy Horne, a registered nurse and board‑certified health and wellness nurse coach, joins me to share how a late autism diagnosis reframed years of confusion, opened doors to therapies, and restored hope for her family.

We talk about the difference a diagnosis can make—not as a label to hide behind, but as a key to access care, educate a village, and reset expectations. Mandy shares the hard parts without flinching: sleepless nights, aggressive moments where her husband shouldered the physical load, and the invisible cost of running on empty. Then we trace the surprising arc of her son’s senior year, where supervised medication changes and a clear call toward ministry sparked a transformation. His YouTube and TikTok outreach is growing fast, and together they’ve launched “Jesus and Autism,” a candid space for families hungry for encouragement and truth.

Threaded through every chapter is a simple practice: surrender beats striving. We trade perfection for flexible habits—micro‑devotions, worship on the go, and five‑minute breath prayers that fit real life. We explore how to build a supportive church community, why “savor the ordinary day” is a lifeline, and how grace for yourself can be the pivot that keeps a home steady. If you’ve felt sandwiched between generations, if you’re waiting on clarity, or if you need language to explain what your family carries, this story offers both practical steps and a steadying peace.

Listen now, share this with a caregiver who needs it, and leave a review to help others find hope in their own season of caring. Subscribe for more stories, tools, and faith‑filled support.

Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome And Guest Introduction
• 0:59 Mandy’s Adoption Story And Early Struggles
• 2:30 Labels, Diagnosis, And Access To Care
• 5:02 The Sandwiched Season With Aging Parents
• 7:15 Why Diagnosis Changes Expectations
• 9:35 Breakthroughs In Jacob’s Senior Year
• 12:05 Faith, Mission, And Building Life Skills
• 14:10 Running On Empty And Finding Rhythm
• 16:15 Community, Church, And Small Practices
• 18:05 Jesus And Autism: A TikTok Ministry
• 20:05 Remembering God’s Promises In Valleys
• 22:05 Grace For Others And Yourself
• 24:00 Savoring Ordinary Days And Surrender
• 25:22 Coaching Resources And Closing

Transcript

Rayna Neises: [00:00:00] Hi, I'm Rayna Neises, your host of A Season of Caring Podcast, where we share stories of hope for family caregivers pushing past the busyness and loneliness of caregiving to see God even in this season. Today I'm excited to introduce you to our special guest, Mandy Horn. Mandy is a registered nurse of over 24 years, a board certified health and wellness nurse coach, and the founder of Wellspring of Life Coaching, after years of hospital nursing, homeschooling, ministry, and caring for her autistic son and aging parents. Mandy understands the exhaustion and beauty of caregiving firsthand.

Her journey through burnout, faith and family challenges led her to create a new rhythm of living. One anchored in rest, renewal, and purpose. Today she helps midwife women of faith, reconnect with God, restore, balance, and rise with confidence into their next season. Mandy, I'm so glad to have you here today. Thank you for joining us.

Mandy Horne: Yeah, thanks for having me, Rayna. [00:01:00] Appreciate it.

Rayna Neises: So tell us a little bit about what your caregiving looks like.

Mandy Horne: Yeah, basically it's a little bit different since it's my son who's, you know, my child and obviously expected to take care of my child. But, so he has autism. He also has been diagnosed with ODD, Oppositional Defiant Disorder and A DHD. Sensory processing, you name it, he is kind of got it. We adopted him. We were there for his delivery. And it was just a almost from the get go, it was not what we expected. And I know that kind of sounds bad, but for parents who were longing for adoption, who we'd been through two failed adoptions before him. And then there we were, we were blessed with him.

And then it was just kind of. Chaos, like nonstop. It was a baby who was crying all the time. Unhappy. We went to the doctors, and just never found answers. As we look back, we think that it, there were some drug use that his birth mother [00:02:00] used. Fast forward to when he was a couple years old, and my husband being a children's pastor at that time, we started just that comparing, which you don't I wanna do as parents, but it was just realizing that something isn't right. Like he's not learning lessons when we discipline him or try to teach him right from wrong. He doesn't get it. We went through, just seasons of him going through some different therapies and testing and they were always, you know, that's where he got like the A DHD label and sensory processing and ODD.

Fast forward to COVID, actually it was right before COVID. He had another big, test that they did because another provider was like, I think maybe he is autistic. So another provider jumped in and scheduled some testing and they diagnosed that he was Autistic and that was like early of 2020, so right before everything shut down. So things didn't get started to help him until, mid 2021. So he was [00:03:00] 14 when everything kind of started. And it's not that we long to have a label on our kid, like a diagnosis, but it definitely helped, it helped knowing what we were dealing with. He was then eligible for certain, therapies that we had been doing for 14 years on our own, and it was We were getting nowhere. We were just on our knees, constantly praying for our child, for something to just click and to change. And it wasn't happening.

And so I think once we had that diagnosis, he was eligible for, behavior therapist, music therapy. He just got a recreational therapist, actually last week that just started. Having those people pouring into your child at that point and also helping to educate us as parents of what's going on. Why is your kid acting this way . You know it, it was so helpful like it was. We look back and there's so many [00:04:00] times that we regret things that we said and did and raising him. Yeah, we didn't, we

Rayna Neises: Yeah.

Mandy Horne: know. And it was, it was an overwhelming season. But anyhow, fast forward to now, there's been some real breakthrough. And then on the caregiving side, so I had a little taste of the caregiver season for my parents. In January and February of this year, 2025, they were both hospitalized. We built a house together, back in 21 and they were kind of coming in to help us with our son and then vice versa. My mom has a lot of health issues, so we were gonna be helping with her to kind of have more support in the home. In early 25 when they were both my mom and dad both hospitalized. It was, it was overwhelming. It was that okay, I wasn't expecting this to come at this time, but it gave me that little taste of what is coming not too far off. Um, what are we gonna be dealing with? So, yeah.[00:05:00] 

Rayna Neises: Yeah, I think all caregiving is challenging, and I think a few of the points that you mentioned was that diagnosis. I know for me with my mom, because it was in 1986 when she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's.

Mandy Horne: Yeah.

Rayna Neises: There wasn't a lot out there, so the diagnosis didn't really help us much. But as my dad later in 2000, probably three I think is when he was diagnosed, there was so much more information and so much more understanding that I do think those labels can help us and just like you mentioned, help with your expectation, help with understanding how to best support and.

Mandy Horne: Yeah.

Rayna Neises: So I encourage families now, there was definitely a time when I was like, I don't think the diagnosis any difference, especially for Alzheimer's. You know, there was no drugs, there was not, there just wasn't a lot out there. And now I think the more that label does [00:06:00] help you, it can help you find community that understands at a level that no one else understands. It can help you to know medications and therapies, like you said, and with insurance, it helps insurance pay for things that it wouldn't pay for, so I'm glad that you finally were able to do that.

And the more research you do, which. I'm sure you were kind of pushing that already just because of the things you had experienced, but it, it just helps you to know what normal is

Mandy Horne: Hmm. 

Rayna Neises: And even though normal is not true, because we're all people and we all, it's all different. What my journey for my mom looked different than my dad, but at the same time, there's similarities. And so the knowledge can just bring help in being able to be more equipped. So.

Mandy Horne: That's definitely.

Rayna Neises: Then, like you said, that season with your parents on top so many times, we are sandwiched. I had a high schooler at home at the same time I was traveling to take care of my dad. [00:07:00] And that's so difficult when you have both needs, especially to have both parents sick at the same time.

That is very challenging, but like you said is reality and frequently when one gets sick. We become more aware of the needs of the other because they're a team. And so one has a tendency to hide, you know, how much they're doing for the other until all of a sudden you're like, oh, wait a minute, what's going on here? So that can be a real eye opener, even more of what's to come.

Mandy Horne: that's for sure. My dad is the main caregiver for my mom, and so when all of a sudden he wasn't there and he was down, it was like, oh my goodness, how are we gonna do this If you know in the future. He were to be the one that goes first. That's,

Rayna Neises: Yep.

Mandy Horne: be stressful, to say the least.

Rayna Neises: And working on top of it as most caregivers are working as well as taking care of others.

Mandy Horne: Yeah.

Rayna Neises: it is a full plate. And I think one of the things that, I love about being [00:08:00] able to share people's stories is so that, those that are listening realize they're not the only ones. Because so many times we're out there in the struggle trying to do the best that we can, feeling like, oh, nobody else is doing this.

Mandy Horne: Yeah,

Rayna Neises: And so.

Mandy Horne: So true. Enemy wants us to feel alone

Rayna Neises: yeah, very much so. So share with us a caregiving story that stands out for you.

Mandy Horne: So I would probably say just the transitions that we've seen in Jakob especially, and really honestly in the last like six months. so I think he. He learned a lot. We grew both of us, like our, my husband and I, and Jakob through the new therapist and things that he was getting. There was just a point that things weren't getting through the way that they needed to for Jakob. And there was, like I said, over the years, just a lot of praying on her knees like. And, and I personally, this is kind of on the side, but we were praying [00:09:00] for the adoption of our son, and the Lord told me very, very clearly that he had a son for us. He was to be named Jakob, with a K. And and then he, he just said that he had huge planes for him and something related to ministry and I didn't know what it didn't. Makes sense to me. I never have known all these years, but it was as clear as day that that is what the Lord said. So that's something I've held onto all these years is yes the Lord, the Lord has a plan for everybody and everybody's life, but it was, it felt like the Lord had something specific that he wanted to do with him. His story, fast forward to his senior year. So he graduated in May of 25, so not very long ago. It was just kind of all over the place of what he wanted to do with his life and everything. Well, literally just as I was praying as his mom for him, like the Lord just totally got ahold of him, the Holy Spirit.

He just had [00:10:00] that encounter with the Holy Spirit of hearing, what he needed to do, and his life has just transformed in the last few months. He's still autistic. He still has many of those qualities but he's so much more clear minded now. He even started with his psychiatrist help, pulling himself off some of his medications, like lowering the doses and things like that. And he has been witnessing to others. He started a YouTube channel, TikTok channel, and he's sharing Christ with people,

Rayna Neises: Hmm.

Mandy Horne: is very cool. He wants to be a missionary. He's got a lot of work to do to do that. He applied and was turned down, but I'm, I'm so grateful for the grace of how the lady, handled it when she was telling him, you know, you're, you're not ready for this. Jakob. Like, you have a support system here. Imagine being in another country and. having that support system. You need to grow, you need to learn to not spend money like crazy on the things that he spends it on, and learn how [00:11:00] to take care of his own food to do things without having that total guidance.

I don't know if he'll get there. I believe in my heart. I trust that he will at some point. But that is kind of that, nervousness for a parent of a child who has a special need is it could be lifelong caregiving. You just, you don't know what the future holds necessarily, but I hold onto that truth and that promise that the Lord, is gonna use his story for a reason to impact others, and he already is.

So that's pretty awesome.

Rayna Neises: It's amazing how that experience has just given him clarity, and I think all of us who have a clarity of mission,

Mandy Horne: yeah.

Rayna Neises: Find motivation in places that we didn't have it before and so much less at At 18. Right? He's 18.

Mandy Horne: He's 18. 

Rayna Neises: And that's such a tough age and brain development, all those things.

It's, most of them struggle with wise choices when it comes to money and those kinds of things because it's just that [00:12:00] experience of life. So it's great that he has a goal and he is working towards it and using now to share the gospel, even though he is not technically, quote unquote in the mission field. He is, he's living that way every day, which is amazing.

Mandy Horne: exactly. Yeah. It is cool.

Rayna Neises: That's a blessing and it feels like that caregiving for him all of those years of questions and advocating and fighting felt like forever. But there's plenty to come and it's exciting to see and to wait and to look at what he's gonna do and how God's going to use him. So what a blessing.

Mandy Horne: Awesome.

Rayna Neises: be one thing that surprised you most about caregiving?

Mandy Horne: I think just how easily we start to run on empty

Rayna Neises: Hmm.

Mandy Horne: that pouring from an empty cup. So it's been rough. I have to say, honestly, my husband has probably dealt with more of it than I have because there were like physical limitations on how strong Jakob got physically and [00:13:00] sometimes aggressive and angry and those kind of things. And my husband had to step in a lot for a lot of that. Some of the addictions that Jakob encountered, like. It wasn't something appropriate for me as mom to, to discuss always with him. So my husband did, and which he's had total breakthrough in those things. Jakob has, which is awesome, but the caregiving is just, there were so many times that we were up all night with him, that to get up in the morning early to go exercise or to get in the word, to have that daily time with God before Jakob woke up. It was so hard to do that. And it's, it's hard as a parent of a child that doesn't have special needs to be diligent and, disciplined to, to do those things, how important they are in your walk daily. then when you have a special need child, I feel like it makes it a little more challenging to, to do that and to just sustain your own emotions and spiritual life. So, [00:14:00] yeah.

Rayna Neises: Yeah, I think we feel like we can Oh, we'll, we'll do it. I mean, we know it's important, but we'll do it later.

Mandy Horne: Yes,

Rayna Neises: So,

Mandy Horne: exactly. 

Rayna Neises: Yeah.

Mandy Horne: which never comes.

Rayna Neises: Never comes. Yeah, and that's where the discipline comes in. That's where figuring out what works for you, or even for me, I know part of what I had to learn was it's a new season, so I needed to do things differently. My devotional time didn't look the same. As it had in other seasons, but it doesn't mean it's not as good. And I think it took me a while to be okay with, okay, what if I just do this instead of that? I've always done that, but maybe if I do this, it's just as good really. So I think sometimes finding that flexibility and explore and to try different ways of developing our relationship with the Lord can make such a big difference.

Mandy Horne: I feel like God has grace for us in those seasons. He knows our heart and [00:15:00] he knows that we're doing our best by all means. For sure.

Rayna Neises: What were some things that you found worked for you to fill your cup?

Mandy Horne: Yeah, I think, definitely just having a community like that church community to help, they didn't necessarily help physically like take Jakob or

Rayna Neises: Right.

Mandy Horne: that necessarily. We kind of really felt like that was our responsibility and, I think having that community, going to church, people that were pouring into him also, which was huge, with even his transition recently, but then for us on a daily basis, having that foundation in our walk with Christ, that we had beforehand going into it.

I just, I can't even imagine being a parent. caregiver anything of anybody and going through any of this season without that hope of Christ, I didn't share this, but Jakob asked me to start doing a podcast with him. So we have a, Jesus and Autism, not podcast, sorry. [00:16:00] TikTok. TikTok. So he has a YouTube channel himself that's going just really big. He has his own TikTok, and then we're doing a mom and son, TikTok together, and it's called Jesus and Autism. I'm finding just the people who are responding and commenting, so many of them don't have that hope of Christ to lean on, and I love that it's become a side ministry that I never expected,

Rayna Neises: Yeah.

Mandy Horne: pour into those families and turn them to the Lord who's given me the strength, who helps fill me up when I'm empty and feel like I can't take another step or have to confront Jakob and say the same thing again for the millionths time that he's not getting, but the Lord gives me that grace and then I can give Jakob that grace,

Rayna Neises: I love that. And I think it's amazing too because we have an idea of what life needs to look like and it never is, right?

Mandy Horne: Yes,

Rayna Neises: always has completely different [00:17:00] plans

Mandy Horne: Yep.

Rayna Neises: so much more amazing. You would never have dreamed of doing TikTok, and here's.

Mandy Horne: for sure. I didn't even have a TikTok account here.

Rayna Neises: Yeah, I don't either. So, but yeah, it's amazing that there's this opportunity and it's not just to give people tips and ideas, but it's to really point them to the truth. And

Mandy Horne: Yeah,

Rayna Neises: know as I've been on a podcast journey, that was one of the things the Lord was like, you can talk about caregiving all you want, but the truth is there isn't.

This is, this is hard. And without me, I'm the answer to, to the hope that's truly there. Because so many of us, our caregiving journeys don't end with a happy ending. Our caregiving journeys end saying goodbye, and that's hard.

Mandy Horne: Yeah.

Rayna Neises: so the hope that's truly in it is what he promises. Not anything that we, that we have here on Earth.

So it's. [00:18:00] It's powerful to be able to be that encourager to others. And I love that he is, leading the charge on that. I'm sure that is huge for those that are listening to

Mandy Horne: Yeah.

Rayna Neises: hear him as well.

Mandy Horne: Absolutely. Yep.

Rayna Neises: Cool. So now I'm gonna ask you, even though you've been sharing it all along, is there one specific story that comes to mind of where God just really showed up for you?

Mandy Horne: Probably the biggest thing, is just that how the Lord met me before Jakob was born and said he had those plans. That kind of helps sustain me through these years. Every time I felt like we were at the end, like, there's no way we can do this anymore. The Lord just reminded me of. I have something I'm gonna use this for. This story is gonna be used for my glory one day. Like there's a reason he's going through it. You know, most of the people that the Lord uses in big ways didn't. Come from like a perfect, you know, church family growing up. Everything was good and peaceful. God does use 'em by all [00:19:00] means. I'm not saying he doesn't, but I feel like the more impact is when you have someone who has had a rough life and the Lord restored and is used them and that they're being obedient despite the things that they're facing and going through. So that seeing the change in Jakob's life this summer. It is just, it has been just, I can't even describe it hardly, what it's like as a parent going through what we went through all these years for 18 years, and it literally just seems like a total miracle in his life to see this transition and transformation. There's nothing else can explain it except for the Holy Spirit, that he's encountered that and made that faith his own, and not just because we're dragging him to church again or anything. 

Rayna Neises: Yeah. And God's faithfulness is always there, and I love that you mentioned that he reminded you of the promise that he had given you, and that's something [00:20:00] that I think we have to really hold onto in those times that we really hear the Lord clearly, is that in the valleys that we hold onto those truths and look forward to what that's gonna look like because. I don't know about you, but he never gives me the details, and so

Mandy Horne: it's not written on the wall, 

Rayna Neises: it's a matter of just that trust that sometimes you just almost, it's hard not to lose hearts.

Mandy Horne: yeah.

Rayna Neises: And so encouraging, you know, Take heart. He has overcome the world and we have that promise. It just might not look like what we think it'll look like. And so that's actually part of the fun, right? The way that He surprises us.

so what would be one thing that you do that helps you to live content, love well, and care without regrets?

Mandy Horne: I would say, that connection with God, my walk with Christ. If I didn't have that, I don't know what my response would be, to [00:21:00] Jakob or the season that went on with my parents . I know it was just two months, but it was pretty rough. My mom is pretty rough in the way she says things and expresses things, and there's not much gratefulness or appreciation through any of it.

So I see that coming and I know that in order for me to face that with her, and of course continue with Jakob, I have to. I have to remember that God has had grace with me through my trials, my difficulty, my responses that weren't appropriate, and that I need to have grace for those, for those that are respond in ways that, that don't feel loving or caring. I can't do that have that grace or hope without spending time in the word, without fellowshipping, other believers, without worship, all of those things that are so important to your walk with Christ. If I didn't have that, I definitely couldn't do it. It would be kind of like that pouring from empty cup that I talked about.

[00:22:00] And, something that I feel like has also helped is trying to avoid just that constant go mode, like nonstop giving myself grace to step back, and to spend time in the word or those kind of things, to not feel overwhelmed and to slow down. Because goes so quick.

So even in those rough seasons, like there's so important and it's important to savor all of those moments.

Rayna Neises: It is one of the, during my caregiving season, I usually each year kind of choose a word. And during my caregiving for my dad, one of the words the Lord really brought to me was grace. And it was interesting 'cause at that time we were always dealing with staffing and hiring and expectations met, not met, all of those things. And so immediately I was like, oh, okay. I need to work on grace towards, you know, all these people that are, I'm bumping up against and trying to help and trying to manage and trying to understand where they're coming from. And grace, I need more grace.

And so that's where my [00:23:00] mindset was initially. And the Lord was kinda like, let's step back a minute. 'cause actually you need more grace for you. You need to understand that you need to have grace for all that you're doing, and stop expecting more than I expect of you, and stop doing and doing and doing and rest.

Allow yourself a grace when you mess up, but also the grace to say no, like you said, and to prioritize where you're at right now and not try to do everything. Because each season there are things we have to let go of. And we can always pick them up later, or he might have something new for us later.

So it's a matter of learning to do that as, especially like you said in caregiving, it's difficult because there are so many more stresses than.

Mandy Horne: Yeah.

Rayna Neises: Than when, when you're not. And it sounds like even now as Jakob's able to take more responsibility for himself, not only is behavior better, but even just your responsibility, you having to do [00:24:00] all of it sounds like it's kind of giving you a little bit more breathing room.

Mandy Horne: Yeah.

Rayna Neises: And so God always knows how we need that. Right.

Mandy Horne: Does, yeah,

Rayna Neises: so as we're, coming to a close, what would be one word of wisdom you'd like to share?

Mandy Horne: Probably that caregiving doesn't come in neat little stages where you have it planned and figure out, you know, okay, my kid's his senior year, he's gonna graduate. But caregiving seasons just come sometimes out of nowhere. Um, unexpected. And the, the thing that I've held onto probably most. Through most of this is Psalm 46, 10 to be still and know that I am God. And that's kind of the heart of what I feel like the Lord has given me in a message is when we stop striving and start surrendering, he gives us peace that just follows so that the time goes fast. The seasons are hard and even in those hard seasons trying to [00:25:00] savor. The ordinary days that come because few and far between. So really being in that present moment and let God redeem, what he started. So

Rayna Neises: I love that. Mandy, I know you've gone into coaching and you're looking to support people, so, feel free to share how they can stay in touch with you and find your resources.

Mandy Horne: yeah. I think I gave you the resource link

Rayna Neises: mm-hmm.

Mandy Horne: But then my website is www.wellspringoflifecoaches. com and there is a link to some other free things on there Also.

Rayna Neises: Okay, so, wellspring of life coaches.com be sure to visit there. It will be on the show notes page. So definitely visit a season of caring.com and you can find the show notes there. Thank you so much Mandy, for being here with us today.

Mandy Horne: Thanks for having me. I appreciate it.

Rayna Neises: And thank you listeners for joining us for Stories of Hope with Mandy on A Season of caring Podcast where there's hope for living content, [00:26:00] loving well, and caring without regrets. If you have financial, legal, or medical questions, be sure to consult your local professionals and take heart in your season of caring.